Advanced Simplification
In response to complaints we've received about the complexity of our contests, the crack Contest Staff at Laughton.org presents our easiest contest ever. Simply divide the countries participating in the 2010 World Cup Tournament into two columns so that the total number of goals scored by the countries in each column is the same. The player who achieves perfect balance wins!
Final Results
July 11, 2010
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| +11 |  | |
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| +37 |  | |
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| +43 |  | |
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| +79 |  | |
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Congratulations to M. Leith, who really does win (remember, we said "no kidding") a soccer ball full of jelly.
It's a full-size plastic soccer ball not suitable for kicking but ideal for storing single-serving packets of assorted fruit jelly.
The flavors are all natural, but there's a little artificial color, and both jelly and container come from South Korea.
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M. Leith had this to say about the results: It just goes to show that the bookmakers are hard to beat!
Thanks to the contest staff at Laughton.org, and thanks to everyone for playing. |
The crack contest staff at Laughton.org also extend their thanks to everyone for playing and hope you will compete again in future contests.
World Cup Match Results
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Cote d'Ivoire 0
Portugal 0 |
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Slovenia 2
United States 2 |
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Cote d'Ivoire 3
Korea North 0 |
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Players, Columns, and Goals
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tiebreaker position: 1 |
Argentina 10 Brazil 9 Chile 3 Denmark 3 France 1 Ghana 5 Honduras 0 Japan 4 Korea South 6 Netherlands 12 Nigeria 3 Portugal 7 Slovakia 5 South Africa 3 Switzerland 1 United States 5
77 |
Algeria 0 Australia 3 Cameroon 2 Cote d'Ivoire 4 England 3 Germany 16 Greece 2 Italy 4 Korea North 1 Mexico 4 New Zealand 2 Paraguay 3 Serbia 2 Slovenia 3 Spain 8 Uruguay 11
68 |
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tiebreaker position: 2 |
Algeria 0 Argentina 10 Australia 3 Chile 3 England 3 France 1 Greece 2 Italy 4 Japan 4 New Zealand 2 Nigeria 3 Paraguay 3 Portugal 7 Serbia 2 Slovenia 3 Uruguay 11
61 |
Brazil 9 Cameroon 2 Cote d'Ivoire 4 Denmark 3 Germany 16 Ghana 5 Honduras 0 Korea North 1 Korea South 6 Mexico 4 Netherlands 12 Slovakia 5 South Africa 3 Spain 8 Switzerland 1 United States 5
84 |
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tiebreaker position: 3 |
Algeria 0 Australia 3 Cameroon 2 Cote d'Ivoire 4 Denmark 3 England 3 France 1 Germany 16 Greece 2 Italy 4 Japan 4 Korea South 6 Netherlands 12 New Zealand 2 Portugal 7 Serbia 2 Slovakia 5 Slovenia 3 South Africa 3 Spain 8 Switzerland 1
91 |
Argentina 10 Brazil 9 Chile 3 Ghana 5 Honduras 0 Korea North 1 Mexico 4 Nigeria 3 Paraguay 3 Uruguay 11 United States 5
54 |
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tiebreaker position: 4 |
Algeria 0 Argentina 10 Brazil 9 Chile 3 Cote d'Ivoire 4 France 1 Germany 16 Ghana 5 Honduras 0 Japan 4 Korea North 1 Mexico 4 Nigeria 3 Serbia 2 Slovenia 3 South Africa 3 Switzerland 1 Uruguay 11
80 |
Australia 3 Cameroon 2 Denmark 3 England 3 Greece 2 Italy 4 Korea South 6 Netherlands 12 New Zealand 2 Paraguay 3 Portugal 7 Slovakia 5 Spain 8 United States 5
65 |
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I decided on the teams which were more likely to score by getting a list of bookmakers odds for each team to win the tournament outright, placed in the order from the most likely down to the least likely. I then ran down the list putting the teams in alternate columns. tiebreaker position: 5 |
Algeria 0 Australia 3 Denmark 3 England 3 Italy 4 Korea North 1 Korea South 6 Mexico 4 Netherlands 12 Nigeria 3 Paraguay 3 Portugal 7 Serbia 2 Slovenia 3 Spain 8 Uruguay 11
73 |
Argentina 10 Brazil 9 Cameroon 2 Chile 3 Cote d'Ivoire 4 France 1 Germany 16 Ghana 5 Greece 2 Honduras 0 Japan 4 New Zealand 2 Slovakia 5 South Africa 3 Switzerland 1 United States 5
72 |
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Simplicity is over-admired sometimes. tiebreaker position: 6 |
Algeria 0 Argentina 10 Brazil 9 Chile 3 Cote d'Ivoire 4 Germany 16 Ghana 5 Honduras 0 Japan 4 Korea South 6 New Zealand 2 Paraguay 3 Serbia 2 Slovenia 3 South Africa 3 Spain 8
78 |
Australia 3 Cameroon 2 Denmark 3 England 3 France 1 Greece 2 Italy 4 Korea North 1 Mexico 4 Netherlands 12 Nigeria 3 Portugal 7 Slovakia 5 Switzerland 1 Uruguay 11 United States 5
67 |
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Random variations on history might win. tiebreaker position: 7 |
Algeria 0 Brazil 9 Chile 3 Cote d'Ivoire 4 England 3 Germany 16 Greece 2 Korea North 1 Korea South 6 Mexico 4 Nigeria 3 Paraguay 3 Slovakia 5 South Africa 3 Uruguay 11 United States 5
78 |
Argentina 10 Australia 3 Cameroon 2 Denmark 3 France 1 Ghana 5 Honduras 0 Italy 4 Japan 4 Netherlands 12 New Zealand 2 Portugal 7 Serbia 2 Slovenia 3 Spain 8 Switzerland 1
67 |
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tiebreaker position: 8 |
Germany 16 Italy 4 Korea South 6 Mexico 4 New Zealand 2 Nigeria 3 Paraguay 3 Portugal 7 Serbia 2 Slovakia 5 Slovenia 3 South Africa 3 Spain 8 Switzerland 1 Uruguay 11 United States 5
83 |
Algeria 0 Argentina 10 Australia 3 Brazil 9 Cameroon 2 Chile 3 Cote d'Ivoire 4 Denmark 3 England 3 France 1 Ghana 5 Greece 2 Honduras 0 Japan 4 Korea North 1 Netherlands 12
62 |
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tiebreaker position: 9 |
Algeria 0 Australia 3 Cameroon 2 Cote d'Ivoire 4 England 3 Germany 16 Greece 2 Italy 4 Korea North 1 Mexico 4 New Zealand 2 Paraguay 3 Serbia 2 Slovenia 3 Spain 8 Uruguay 11
68 |
Argentina 10 Brazil 9 Chile 3 Denmark 3 France 1 Ghana 5 Honduras 0 Japan 4 Korea South 6 Netherlands 12 Nigeria 3 Portugal 7 Slovakia 5 South Africa 3 Switzerland 1 United States 5
77 |
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tiebreaker position: 10 |
Algeria 0 Argentina 10 Australia 3 Brazil 9 Cameroon 2 Chile 3 Cote d'Ivoire 4 Denmark 3 England 3 France 1 Germany 16 Ghana 5 Greece 2 Honduras 0 Italy 4 Japan 4
69 |
Korea North 1 Korea South 6 Mexico 4 Netherlands 12 New Zealand 2 Nigeria 3 Paraguay 3 Portugal 7 Serbia 2 Slovakia 5 Slovenia 3 South Africa 3 Spain 8 Switzerland 1 Uruguay 11 United States 5
76 |
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tiebreaker position: 11 |
Algeria 0 Australia 3 Brazil 9 Chile 3 Cote d'Ivoire 4 Denmark 3 Germany 16 Greece 2 Honduras 0 Italy 4 Japan 4 Korea North 1 Korea South 6 Mexico 4 New Zealand 2 Paraguay 3 Serbia 2 Slovakia 5 Slovenia 3 Spain 8 Switzerland 1 Uruguay 11
94 |
Argentina 10 Cameroon 2 England 3 France 1 Ghana 5 Netherlands 12 Nigeria 3 Portugal 7 South Africa 3 United States 5
51 |
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Inveniam goalum aut facium tiebreaker position: 12 |
Argentina 10 Brazil 9 England 3 France 1 Germany 16 Italy 4 Netherlands 12 Slovakia 5 Slovenia 3 Spain 8
71 |
Algeria 0 Australia 3 Cameroon 2 Chile 3 Cote d'Ivoire 4 Denmark 3 Ghana 5 Greece 2 Honduras 0 Japan 4 Korea North 1 Korea South 6 Mexico 4 New Zealand 2 Nigeria 3 Paraguay 3 Portugal 7 Serbia 2 South Africa 3 Switzerland 1 Uruguay 11 United States 5
74 |
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tiebreaker position: 13 |
Australia 3 Cameroon 2 Cote d'Ivoire 4 Denmark 3 France 1 Germany 16 Ghana 5 Greece 2 Honduras 0 Italy 4 Japan 4 Korea North 1 Korea South 6 Mexico 4 Netherlands 12 New Zealand 2 Nigeria 3 Paraguay 3 Portugal 7 Serbia 2 Slovakia 5 Slovenia 3 South Africa 3 Switzerland 1 Uruguay 11 United States 5
112 |
Algeria 0 Argentina 10 Brazil 9 Chile 3 England 3 Spain 8
33 |
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This is the official entry of Laughton.org and not eligible to win a prize. The columns were composed by splitting each tournament group according to its teams' current FIFA world ranking: from groups A-D, the highest- and lowest-ranked teams were placed in the right column and the other two in the left. From groups E-H, the highest- and lowest-ranked teams were placed in the left column and the other two in the right. The sums of the FIFA rankings in the left and right columns are 414 and 427 respectively. A perfect balance in the rankings is neither practical nor desirable due to the inclusion of both the #1 and #3 teams in group G, and the teams ranked worse than #50 will probably all get pounded to statistical insignificance anyway. tiebreaker position: 14 |
Australia 3 Brazil 9 Greece 2 Honduras 0 Italy 4 Japan 4 Korea North 1 Mexico 4 Netherlands 12 New Zealand 2 Nigeria 3 Serbia 2 Slovenia 3 Spain 8 Uruguay 11 United States 5
73 |
Algeria 0 Argentina 10 Cameroon 2 Chile 3 Cote d'Ivoire 4 Denmark 3 England 3 France 1 Germany 16 Ghana 5 Korea South 6 Paraguay 3 Portugal 7 Slovakia 5 South Africa 3 Switzerland 1
72 |
Special Bonus Feature
Click for John Cleese's simple explanation of the "offsides" rule.
How to Play
Use the entry form below. Click on the buttons to put a country into the left column or the right. By default, they're all in the left column, so you only need to click on the ones you want to move to the right. What could be simpler? Fill in the player name and e-mail address, click SUBMIT, and you're done! Of course, a space is provided for comments; use it if you must, but in the spirit of the competition, please keep your remarks simple.
Scoring
Even though the scoring is so simple that you could do it yourself, the Contest Staff at Laughton.org will compute the scores for everyone. Feel free to check our work. We'll add up the goals scored by all the World Cup teams and then compute the difference between the left and right columns for each player. At the end of the tournament, the winner will be the player with the smallest difference between the goals scored by each of his groups. Look for results to be posted on this page frequently during the competition.
We will only be counting goals scored during regular or overtime play. Matches that are tied after overtime may be settled by a shootout; shootout scores will not be counted.
A Simple Tiebreaker
In the event of a tie, the player whose entry arrived first at Laughton.org will be declared the winner.
Participating Countries
They're listed on the entry form below. They're also listed on this mural page in more memorable form.
Entry Deadline
Entries must be received no later than June 10, 2010, US Eastern Time. No exceptions.
Prizes
The winning player will receive a soccer ball full of jelly. No kidding. If there are many entries, second- and third-place prizes may be awarded.
A Few Simple Rules
You may send only one entry from an e-mail address. If you have more than one address, you may send one entry from each.
Illegible, irrational, or improperly formatted entries will be discarded.
Entries containing libelous, scurrilous, or scandalous text will be discarded.
